I used to feel weight loss surgery was the 'easy way out', 'cheating', and 'shameful'. I wouldn't even consider it. However, that all changed just a couple days ago. I decided to weigh in early, eager to see the results of my '10 day' pledge. I wasn't sure if I had lost weight, I wasn't even hopeful of it. I thought I would have just maintained, maybe lost a pound, but nothing big enough to get excited about. I also thought that if I would have lost more than a pound, it would be the result of the 'runs' many of the real foods have given me in this detox, and that it wouldn't count as weight lost being no fat was burned. So, I weighed in and I had gained weight. Since my scale also measures body fat, I compared that as well to my pre-pledge recordings and found it had increased. I have to admit, I cried. I became really tearful for the first time in awhile. I've grown a thicker skin (literally and figuratively), but this was a disappointment. I know it shouldn't have been such a big deal given I wasn't expecting miracles, but I'm sure many of you will understand where I'm coming from.
So, I thought back to surgery and other 'desperate attempts'. Sure, I could try just not eating, but a range of problems can come from that, including hair loss and infertility. The same with bulimia. I've thrown up meals before, but I wouldn't consider myself bulimic as it wasn't something I obsessed over. I knew in my mind what I was doing and I would only do it to get my ex to shut up for eating the entire footlong from Subway, etc. After previously being in a Dental Hygiene Program through college, I became a bit more worried about oral health, other than just breath and white teeth. In the program, we did talk about bulimia and the effects it has on the mouth, as well as the rest of the body. Honestly (and I'm sure I'll get ridicule for this), I felt like it wasn't a bad deal if you wanted to lose 10 or 20 lbs. But being I weigh over 300, I would be several 'stomach acid baths' in my mouth, and I nixed it. And no, by no means do I recommend throwing up food. I am just explaining the thought process I've gone through over my weight.
Anywho, I checked out the lap band. I liked that it was less invasive than gastric bypass, but I didn't like the constant bad reports of extreme nausea, the band basically 'going bad' inside the body and insurance not paying to remove it, or even the thought of this huge piece of plastic inside my body. Sure staples are also a foreign substance, but at least its not some huge thing. I also had images in my head of the port somehow wrapping around organs and causing issues. I'm sure our medical technology is great, but the lap band just isn't for me.
Gastric bypass has had huge success. However, I don't like the idea of 'dumping syndrome' when I already have IBS. You're intestines are rerouting so food literally bypasses the stomach. That sounds like a world of trouble! Can't you become malnourished? The 'dumping syndrome' would also totally make sense, since food is just going straight to your bowels. Also, intestines are so long and the idea of moving them around seems way too risky, despite all the successes I've read about.
Then I found the Gastric Sleeve. At first, I thought some 'sleeve' or tube was inserted, and it'd be another big plastic thing like the lap bound. Actually, that's not the case. A majority of your stomach is removed but it's not 'shortened', bringing the bottom of it (where stomach acid sits) closer to your esophagus, making me worry about acid reflux. Instead, the stomach keeps its structure, but the excess of it is removed, making it more of a 'tube' shape than the somewhat kidney bean shape it has. Along with the removed portion of the stomach is a gland that lets out a hormone triggering your appetite. Being that weight has been a problem for most of my life, so I know it'll continue to be an issue in my future, I think cutting out this hormone is a great idea! Yes, you can stretch out your new stomach. But, when you overeat, you're also stretching out your stomach. So, it's like your getting a fresh start, and this time, don't stretch it out! With the Gastric Sleeve, there is not 'dumping syndrome' reported. The surgery is done laparoscopically and no nerves are severed. The more I read about it, the better I felt about it.
More information about weight loss surgery can be found by clicking here. I think this is a great source that keeps things in layman's terms.
So, I went to see my primary physician today about this. She made sure I did my research (which I had done all day and all night for a couple days straight.... thanks insomnia) and finally approved. She is having her assistant set up an appointment with a surgeon she recommends. She recommended that I also attend a seminar to make sure I get all the information about various procedures, without the biased opinions found online. Although, despite people's opinions, I'm still pretty set on the Gastric Sleeve. I will attend the seminar though. She also recommends I join a support group, which I had planned to do post-operatively, but she suggests I do it before hand as well. I wish there was a way to skip this '6 month diet' waiting period for insurance. I've BEEN dieting... what's going to be any different over the next 6 months? Sigh. Oh well, you do whatcha gotta do and it'll be worth it.
Excess Skin and Scaring. Yes, I am not a fan of scars and def a little worried about excess skin. However, I'd rather have to pay for skin removal surgery someday than continue to be FAT! Also, I have scars from my galbladder surgery. They were noticeable at first, but they've faded now and I'd imagine that's what the weight loss surgery scars would do as well. Again, losing weight matters more than a few scars. Also, with the excess skin, I'm hoping I'm young enough that my skin will 'bounce back', but I'll deal with it if it doesn't.
Many view weight loss surgery the way I used to. However, it is no magical surgery. It's not even lipo. It's going to help me a great deal, but I still have to put in the effort in the gym and with eating right. I will still have to make a lifestyle change, regardless. I respect everyone's opinions on this, but this is my choice and I do feel that at this stage, over 300 lbs, this is the right choice for me. Several friends of mine dont approve, so if not all my friends approve, than I dont expect the entire internet to either. However, I am about honesty and so you will only hear the truth from me, good or bad. If I am approved for the surgery, you will hear about the good, the bad, and the ugly.
XOXO,
Miss Fat Girl
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